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ACT Mindfully

ACT Mindfully

 A = Accept your thoughts & feelings, and be present.

C = Choose a valued direction.

T = Take action!

Six Core Processes of ACT

CONNECT WITH NOW ~ Allows you to engage fully in what you are doing. ~ Enables you to ‘catch’ thoughts ‘in flight’.

OBSERVING SELF ~ A transcendent sense of self: a perspective to observe self-as-context. ~ Is a process, not a thing, an awareness of awareness itself.

ACCEPTANCE ~ Defused, open, undefended contact with the present moment. ~ Opening yourself fully to experience, as it is, not as your mind says it is.

DEFUSION ~ Noticing thoughts rather than being caught up in them. ~ Seeing thoughts as what they are, not as what they seem to be.

VALUES ~ Give life meaning and give a sense of abundance. ~ What you want to stand for in life, are different to goals.

COMMITTED ACTION ~ Overt behaviour without fear. ~ Values-guided, effective and mindful.

These are the six core processes we focus on. The six can be ‘lumped’ together into three functionalities as follows; Defusion & Acceptance are about separating from thoughts and feelings, seeing them for what they really are, making room for them, and allowing them to come and go of their own accord. In other words: “Opening up.”Connect with Now & Observing Self both involve making contact with various aspects of your here-and-now experience. In other words: “Being present.” Values & Committed Action involves what you want your life to be about and facilitating life enhancing action. In other words: “Doing what matters.” When you put it all together, you will have the ability to “Be present, open up and do what matters!”

The aim of ACT is to create a rich, full and meaningful life while accepting the pain that inevitably goes with it. The outcome we aim for in ACT is mindful, valued living. Learn how to ‘step back’ and detach from your thoughts, images and memories. Hopefully, after just one session, you will have the tools to start working towards a blissful life. Make an Appointment Today!

Always in Confidence – John Shearer 

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Life Choices

15 Things You Should Give Up To Be Happy

Here is a list of 15 things from the Purpose Fairy which, if you give up on them, will make your life a lot easier and much, much happier. We hold on to so many things that cause us a great deal of pain, stress and suffering – and instead of letting them all go, instead of allowing ourselves to be stress free and happy – we cling on to them. Not anymore. Starting today we will give up on all those things that no longer serve us, and we will embrace change. Ready? Here we go:

1. GIVE UP YOUR NEED TO ALWAYS BE RIGHT

There are so many of us who can’t stand the idea of being wrong – wanting to always be right – even at the risk of ending great relationships or causing a great deal of stress and pain, for us and for others. It’s just not worth it. Whenever you feel the ‘urgent’ need to jump into a fight over who is right and who is wrong, ask yourself this question: “Would I rather be right, or would I rather be kind?”  Wayne Dyer. What difference will that make? Is your ego really that big?

2. GIVE UP YOUR NEED FOR CONTROL

Be willing to give up your need to always control everything that happens to you and around you – situations, events, people, etc. Whether they are loved ones, coworkers, or just strangers you meet on the street – just allow them to be. Allow everything and everyone to be just as they are and you will see how much better will that make you feel.

“By letting it go it all gets done. The world is won by those who let it go. But when you try and try. The world is beyond winning.” Lao Tzu

3. GIVE UP ON BLAME

Give up on your need to blame others for what you have or don’t have, for what you feel or don’t feel. Stop giving your powers away and start taking responsibility for your life.

4. GIVE UP YOUR SELF-DEFEATING SELF-TALK

Oh my. How many people are hurting themselves because of their negative, polluted and repetitive self-defeating mindset? Don’t believe everything that your mind is telling you – especially if it’s negative and self-defeating. You are better than that.

“The mind is a superb instrument if used rightly. Used wrongly, however, it becomes very destructive.”  Eckhart Tolle

5. GIVE UP YOUR LIMITING BELIEFS

about what you can or cannot do, about what is possible or impossible. From now on, you are no longer going to allow your limiting beliefs to keep you stuck in the wrong place. Spread your wings and fly!

“A belief is not an idea held by the mind, it is an idea that holds the mind” Elly Roselle

6. GIVE UP COMPLAINING

Give up your constant need to complain about those many, many, maaany things – people, situations, events that make you unhappy, sad and depressed. Nobody can make you unhappy, no situation can make you sad or miserable unless you allow it to. It’s not the situation that triggers those feelings in you, but how you choose to look at it. Never underestimate the power of positive thinking.

7. GIVE UP THE LUXURY OF CRITICISM

Give up your need to criticize things, events or people that are different than you. We are all different, yet we are all the same. We all want to be happy, we all want to love and be loved and we all want to be understood. We all want something, and something is wished by us all.

8. GIVE UP YOUR NEED TO IMPRESS OTHERS

Stop trying so hard to be something that you’re not just to make others like you. It doesn’t work this way. The moment you stop trying so hard to be something that you’re not, the moment you take off all your masks, the moment you accept and embrace the real you, you will find people will be drawn to you, effortlessly.

9. GIVE UP YOUR RESISTANCE TO CHANGE

Change is good. Change will help you move from A to B. Change will help you make improvements in your life and also the lives of those around you. Follow your bliss, embrace change – don’t resist it.
“Follow your bliss and the universe will open doors for you where there were only walls”  Joseph Campbell

10. GIVE UP LABELS

Stop labeling those things, people or events that you don’t understand as being weird or different and try opening your mind, little by little. Minds only work when open. “The highest form of ignorance is when you reject something you don’t know anything about.”  Wayne Dyer

11. GIVE UP ON YOUR FEARS

Fear is just an illusion, it doesn’t exist – you created it. It’s all in your mind. Correct the inside and the outside will fall into place.
“The only thing we have to fear, is fear itself.”  Franklin D. Roosevelt

12. GIVE UP YOUR EXCUSES

Send them packing and tell them they’re fired. You no longer need them. A lot of times we limit ourselves because of the many excuses we use. Instead of growing and working on improving ourselves and our lives, we get stuck, lying to ourselves, using all kind of excuses – excuses that 99.9% of the time are not even real.

13. GIVE UP THE PAST

I know, I know. It’s hard. Especially when the past looks so much better than the present and the future looks so frightening, but you have to take into consideration the fact that the present moment is all you have and all you will ever have. The past you are now longing for – the past that you are now dreaming about – was ignored by you when it was present. Stop deluding yourself. Be present in everything you do and enjoy life. After all life is a journey not a destination. Have a clear vision for the future, prepare yourself, but always be present in the now.

14. GIVE UP ATTACHMENT

This is a concept that, for most of us is so hard to grasp and I have to tell you that it was for me too, (it still is) but it’s not something impossible. You get better and better at with time and practice. The moment you detach yourself from all things, (and that doesn’t mean you give up your love for them – because love and attachment have nothing to do with one another,  attachment comes from a place of fear, while love… well, real love is pure, kind, and self less, where there is love there can’t be fear, and because of that, attachment and love cannot coexist) you become so peaceful, so tolerant, so kind, and so serene. You will get to a place where you will be able to understand all things without even trying. A state beyond words.

15. GIVE UP LIVING YOUR LIFE TO OTHER PEOPLE’S EXPECTATIONS

Way too many people are living a life that is not theirs to live. They live their lives according to what others think is best for them, they live their lives according to what their parents think is best for them, to what their friends, their enemies and their teachers, their government and the media think is best for them. They ignore their inner voice, that inner calling. They are so busy with pleasing everybody, with living up to other people’s expectations, that they lose control over their lives. They forget what makes them happy, what they want, what they need….and eventually they forget about themselves.  You have one life – this one right now – you must live it, own it, and especially don’t let other people’s opinions distract you from your path.

Categories
Mindfulness

New Approach to Life

Mindfulness is a new approach to life. Most of the time we are occupied with our own thoughts – thinking about what has happened in the past or imagining what might happen in the future. So much so that many of us live most of our lives on autopilot.  Through mindfulness we develop the capacity to become more aware of what is happening in our lives as they are unfolding. And we do this without coloring it with our judgments, fears, hopes, or fantasies. By reducing distractions, mindfulness helps us focus our attention, enabling us to directly experience what is happening right here, right now. After all, nothing ever happens in the past or in the future. “Now” is the only time where our lives unfold. The only moment when we are alive.

Research shows that mindfulness can prevent or reduce the severity of stress-related illnesses, including depression. Studies have shown its positive effects on the immune system, pain, chronic depression, sleep, and anxiety. Mindfulness also leads to increased levels of concentration, tranquility, and a general feeling of well-being.

Mindfulness techniques are powerful and easy to learn. Just one session could change your life forever!

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Mindfulness

The Practice of Mindfulness

Mindfulness has gained a lot of momentum in recent years mostly due to it’s significant practical application for mind, body, emotions and spirit. It is also a simple but powerful route to getting unstuck, putting us back into the drivers seat of our lives and allowing us to move beyond the limiting perspective of how we have seen ourselves and the world. This is achieved through observation, self-inquiry, and mindful action.

When we start a new practice, we must initially recognise that there are forces which seek to work against us. Our habitual unawareness seeks to reassert its dominance in our lives because remember- we have been living automatically and unconsciously in this way for many years. These are the moments that we often encounter deep seated emotional wounds and fears that lie unacknowledged within us. Yet, if we capture the sacredness of this opportunity for growth, we come to understand at a much deeper level, we appreciate our feelings and we are more empowered by them. Our wounds are no longer our Achille’s heel but the source of our greatest strength. Perhaps more importantly, the quality of our relationship with ourselves takes on a renewed meaning. We remember what it is like to fall in love with self again.

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Mindfulness

Mindfulness Definitions

There are many facets to mindfulness. These include; living in the present moment, engaging fully in what you are doing rather than getting caught up in your thoughts, allowing your feelings to be as they are, letting them come and go rather than trying to control them. When you observe your private experiences with openness and receptiveness, even the most painful thoughts, feelings, sensations and memories can seem less threatening or unbearable. In this way mindfulness can help you to transform your relationship with painful thoughts and feelings, in a way that reduces their impact and influence over your life. Here are some definitions of Mindfulness.

“Awareness of present experience with acceptance.”

“Paying attention in a particular way: on purpose, in the present moment and non-judgementally.”

“Consciously bringing awareness to your here-and-now experience, with openness, interest and receptiveness.”

“The non-judgemental observation of the ongoing stream of internal and external stimuli as they arise.”

“Bringing ones complete attention to the present experience on a moment to moment basis.”

“The defused, accepting and open contact with the present moment.”

“Mindfulness is the aware, balanced acceptance of the present experience. It isn’t more complicated than that. It is opening to or receiving the present moment, pleasant or unpleasant, just as it is, without either clinging to it or rejecting it.”

“Mindfulness is simply being aware of what is happening right now without wishing it were different; enjoying the pleasant without holding on when it changes (which it will); being with the unpleasant without fearing it will always be this way (which it won’t).”

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Mindfulness

What is Mindfulness?

‘Mindfulness’ is an ancient concept, found in a wide range of spiritual and religious traditions, including most martial arts, yoga, tai chi, Buddhism, Taoism, Hinduism, Judaism, Islam, and Christianity. Gradually, over the last 30 years, Western psychology has started to recognise the many benefits of mindfulness training, and it has now become an empirically supported intervention in a wide range of clinical disorders.
‘Mindfulness’ can be defined in a variety of different ways, but they all basically come down to this: paying attention with flexibility, openness, and curiosity.
This simple definition tells us three important things. First, mindfulness is a process of awareness, not thinking. It involves paying attention to your experience in the moment as opposed to being caught up in thoughts. Second, mindfulness involves a particular attitude: one of openness and curiosity. Even if our experience in the moment is difficult, painful or unpleasant, we can be open to and curious about it instead of running from or fighting with it. Third, mindfulness involves flexibility of attention: the ability to consciously direct, broaden or focus attention on different aspects of experience. We can use mindfulness to ‘wake up,’ connect with ourselves and appreciate the fullness of each moment of life. We can use it to improve our self-knowledge – to learn more about how we feel, think and react. We can use it to connect deeply and intimately with the people we care about, including ourselves. And we can use it to consciously influence our own behaviour and increase our range of responses to the world we inhabit. It is the action of living consciously – a profound way to enhance psychological resilience and increase life satisfaction.