I Promise Myself

1Be You

I Promise Myself

  1. to laugh as if nobody’s watching, and love as if I’ve never been hurt before.
  2. to live as if I were to die tomorrow, and learn as if I were to live forever.
  3. to let go of the heavy burden of my past. To turn my wounds into wisdom and my  difficulties into opportunities.
  4. to love myself as much as I would like others to love me.
  5. to die to the past every night, so that I can be born again each morning.
  6. to never speak from a place of hate, jealousy, anger, or insecurity. And to always evaluate my words before I let them leave my lips.
  7. to forgive so that I can heal, and let go so that I can grow.
  8. to learn from every experience and every interaction life sends my way.
  9. to always look for the good in people. To treat everyone with love, kindness, compassion, appreciation and never speak badly of anyone.
  10. to allow life’s many challenges to make me better, not bitter.
  11. to complain less, and live my life with an attitude of gratitude.
  12. to create a sense of purpose and bring meaning into everyday life. No matter how many times I fall or fail, I promise myself to never give up on myself or my dreams.
  13. to let go of all the drama in my life, and only hold on to those things that bring me joy.
  14. to live my life in a way that inspires others and strive to bring out the best in them.
  15. to surround myself with people who make me hungry for life, touch my heart, and nurture my spirit.
  16. to think less and feel more. To judge less and trust more. To fear less and love more.
  17. to walk away from everything that no longer serves me, grows me, or makes me happy.
  18. to spend more time connecting with my authentic self, and less time chasing the love and approval of those around me.
  19. to show the world who I truly am and not consider what people might be thinking about me.
  20. to transform my inner vision until I see nothing but light, my own and all those around me.
  21. to let go of any bad habits I might be holding on to, and walk away from all those things that hold me back in life.
  22. to let go of all blame and take full responsibility for my own life.
  23. to allow the world know me as I am, not as it thinks I should be.
  24. to be tender with the young, compassionate with the aged, sympathetic with the striving, and empathetic of the weak.
  25. to clothe myself with love and wear this love wherever I go.
  26. to care more about being kind than I do about being right all the time.
  27. to give more of my time to those who are special in my life, and show them how much they really mean to me.
  28. to trust my inner voice and intuition more than I trust the loud voice of those around me.
  29. to expect less from others but more and more from myself.
  30. to allow those I care for to be perfectly themselves without trying to twist them to fit my own image. Loving them for who they are and not for what I want them to be.

And above all! I Promise Myself to Be Mindful! Love & Laughter Always! – John

Positive Psychology

Perspective

In simple terms, positive psychology focuses on what’s working rather than on what’s not working; it asks what’s right rather than what’s wrong; the emphasis is on utilising strengths instead of fixing weaknesses (although please note; positive psychology doesn’t ignore faults, weaknesses and limitations. It accepts that we all have these but that as much as possible, our efforts and energies should be mostly, on using what we’re already good at).

We can sum up the core components of positive psychology that contribute to happiness and success in the following acronym. We believe that achieving happiness requires nothing more than practicing a few simple disciplines each and every day and to practice these disciplines we need to constantly make the right choices. So, next time you’re making a choice remember that “choose” is not just a philosophy of taking responsibility but also, a mnemonic that stands for:
C = Clarity
Clarity refers to your goals, direction and purpose in life. Happy people set goals that are much more clearly defined. They more actively and effectively determine clear and specific plans to ensure these goals become reality. So, set aside some time to clarify your life plan as soon as possible because if you don’t do it, no one else will do it for you!
H = Healthy Living
Healthy living is about activity and exercise, diet and nutrition and sleep. Health forms a crucial part of the foundation to happiness. It’s hard to be happy if you’re literally sick and tired all the time. So, although you don’t have to turn vegan and/or run marathons, do whatever you can to be healthy (by eating well, exercising and ensuring you gain adequate sleep and rest) and you’ll also boost your chances of being happy.
O = Optimism
Optimism refers to positive but realistic thinking. There’s no doubt that happy people think about themselves, others and the world around them differently. Among other things, they search for more positives although they also face up to cold, hard realities in a constructive way. The good news is that this is something you can learn to do so start practicing now – look around you for what’s good and look at what you can actively do to fix what’s not so good.
O = Others
When we consider others, we are considering the key relationships in your life. Research strongly indicates that happy people have both more and better quality relationships. Happiness is not a solo sport; it’s a team effort. Make sure you devote time to developing and fostering your key relationships because other people matter and compassion, thoughtfulness, caring and consideration of others are key to real and meaningful happiness.
S = Strengths
The “S” for strengths represents your core qualities and attributes. Rather than spending all their time trying to “fix” their “weaknesses”, happy people spend more time identifying and utilising their strengths. So quite simply, stop asking “what’s wrong and how can I fix it” quite so often and start asking “what’s right and how can I do more of it”. Find out what you’re good at (your inner attributes and positive qualities) and do it as much as possible in as many ways as possible.
E = Enjoy the moment
Finally, enjoying the moment is about living in and appreciating the present. The past is history, tomorrow’s a mystery, and today’s a gift – that’s why they call it “the present”. Live in the moment and enjoy life more; learn from the past but look to the future and ask, “What can I do now?” Practice appreciation and gratitude by focusing more on what you have and less on what you don’t have.

So there it is, a brief overview of positive psychology or what is sometimes referred to as the science of happiness. If there were one message I’d like you to walk away with it would be that happiness is very much achievable! No matter who you are and what you do, no matter what your background or your current context, you can all learn to live lives with more happiness. We can all become happier. We can’t change the past and we can’t control all that happens to us but we can CHOOSE how we respond to what happens and as a result, we can (at least partially) determine our future!

Many Thanks to Dr Tim Sharp for this post. (The Happiness Institute)
Love, Laughter & Be Mindful Always! ~ John

15 Steps to become Grateful & more Positive

 Be Grateful

“Gratitude is not only the greatest of virtues, but the parent of all others.” ~Cicero

Being grateful is both a state of mind and perspective. One person’s idea of expressing gratitude may completely contradict another. Most of us are not born eternal optimists, but being positive and grateful is something that can be imbibed even if a tad forcibly; such as by trying to tweak our sense of humour, the way we react to a given situation, by being more pleasant and believing others too have a mind, by smiling each time somebody says ‘thank you’, and by understanding that every person is on their own journey and accepting that it’s not your position to judge them.

Here are 15 steps to help you become a more positive person and grateful for all that you have in your life.

1. Appreciate

Appreciate what you have and value it. Try counting your positives and be grateful for all the good things and people in your life. If you’re concerned about wealth and success, know that these can be whatever you like. Abundance comes in many forms. If you’re healthy, think about how many people are counting their last breath. If you don’t have as much money as you would like, think about the millions of parents in the world that cannot even feed their families. Perhaps redefining what wealth and abundance are may go a long way.

2. Stop Labeling

Stop labeling those things, people or events that you don’t understand as being weird or different and try opening your mind, little by little. Minds only work when open. Don’t allow your limiting beliefs to keep you stuck in the wrong place. Spread your wings and fly! Once you realize all is possible, the doors of limitation that were closed in your mind will open be connected to all those aspects of consciousness.

3. Optimism

Treat failure as an opportunity to learn a new and better lesson from life, and that’s the trick to manufacture optimism in life. Never give up trying because that’s an indication that something better is in store. Once you start harbouring an optimistic attitude towards life, success will automatically follow. Give up your constant need to complain and criticize about those things — people, situations, events that make you unhappy, sad and depressed. Nobody can make you unhappy; no situation can make you sad or miserable unless you allow it to. When you criticize, you are passing self-judgement for something lacking in your life that you refuse to let go of. Never underestimate the power of positive thinking. For every opportunity you feel the inclination to criticize, try to think about how that specific situation is serving or benefiting others.

4. Release The Past

The past you are now longing for — the past that you are now dreaming about — was ignored by you when it was present. Stop deluding yourself. Have a clear vision for the future, prepare yourself, but always be present in the now. Work on this by practicing with simple tasks every day. We often assume the past looked so much better than the present and the future looks so frightening, but you have to take into consideration the fact that the present moment is all you have and all you will ever have. Be present in everything you do and enjoy life. After all life is a journey not a destination. Have a clear vision for the future, prepare yourself, but always be present in the now.

5. Avoid Comparison

Nothing is as awful as comparing yourself to someone else. If you think you’re better that the other person, you’re letting yourself regale in an unhealthy sense of superiority. If you demean yourself in front of others, it means all your hard work and progress has been in vain. While social comparisons are unhealthy, self-improvement is effective.

6. Kindness

There’s a scientific reason behind every act of kindness that you do; helping someone selflessly releases serotonin in your brain (serotonin is the hormone that controls your mood) and hence makes you feel good about yourself almost instantly. Try doing one act of kindness every day to flush out the toxins of depression from your system. Thank god, thank your parents, friends, and thank yourself for all the hard work you did, for everything you achieved. Saying thank you frequently makes you humble, and a humble person is seldom cynical.

7. Stop Using Excuses

Send them packing and tell them they’re fired. You no longer need them. A lot of times we limit ourselves because of the many excuses we use. Instead of growing and working on improving ourselves and our lives, we get stuck, lying to ourselves, using all kind of excuses — excuses that most of the time are not even real. We sabotage ourselves beyond belief. If you find yourself making excuses, ask yourself why you are creating the excuse in the first place?

8. Nurture Relationships

One way to becoming positive is to seek positive company, as both positivity and negativity are infectious. If the people you spend most of your time with are grumpy or have a pessimistic standpoint, you’ll find yourself inadvertently mirroring the same emotions with others. In order to inculcate positivity it is imperative that your friend circle is a positive, energetic, and a happy bunch. You’ll find yourself carrying the same positivity everywhere you go. Relationships keep us alive and kicking. In fact, according to research studies, loneliness doubles people’s mortality rates. A circle of good friends, loving family members and cheerful colleagues are a reminder that you have people who care about you. There’s nothing like having someone who you can share your experiences with. So nurture these relationships and say goodbye to a lonesome existence. You are never alone and there are always people around you that need your energy whether you know it or not.

9. Forgiveness

Hatred is a negative feeling and harbouring it will have nothing but negative effects on your well-being. Stop thinking about the hateful emotion/person and let it go. Forgive if needed, take things lightly and let it not affect your system. There are so many of us who can’t stand the idea of being wrong — wanting to always be right — even at the risk of ending great relationships or causing a great deal of stress and pain, for us and for others. We love to right-fight. It’s just not worth it because the state of being right is all subjective with so many layers and perspectives of truth. Accept that you have a different perspective than others and allow them to “be right” if this helps you move relationships in a positive direction. Would you rather be kind or be right? Accept responsibility for yourself, your life and your actions. You are response-able. You are an adult. You are account-able, meaning, with every action you take, you account for it. You chose to do it; you must accept the consequences of it and that you did it all for a reason… to learn. If you continue to feel you can’t for forgive or feel guilty for your actions, you stop learning.

10. Avoid Impressing Others

Success may have nothing to do with how much money you have or how many cars you have, but how you choose to live a life of abundance. Abundance comes in many forms, many of which have nothing to do with material things. The moment you stop trying so hard to be something that you’re not, the moment you take off all your masks, the moment you accept and embrace the real you, you will find people will be drawn to you, effortlessly. Let go of any expectations of yourself that will limit your growth. If you hold high expectations for how others should behave, you will often be disappointed if they do not represent themselves in the manner you expected. It is only your expectations of people that cause you to judge them, which ultimately is a judgement of yourself. Far too many people are living a life that is not theirs to live. They live their lives according to what others think is best for them, they live their lives according to what their parents think is best for them, to what their friends, their enemies and their teachers, their government and the media think is best for them. They ignore their inner voice, that inner calling. They often forget what makes them happy, what they want, what they need. You have one life — this one right now — you must live it, own it, and especially don’t let other people’s opinions distract you from your path.

11. Commit To Your Goals

If you have a goal, work towards it. Anything is achievable if you put your heart into it. Whole-hearted dedication and diligence can bring extraordinary results and consequentially add to your happiness. It is very easy to lose vision for what we truly want in life, but it is your dedication towards your goals above and beyond all obstacles that will make the difference. When we look for positivity in the little things that make our lives worthwhile, we leave no room for negativity and our goals come to the forefront. Instead of recounting all events of the day, filter out only the positive ones and make a note of them. It could be anything trivial, from your bus arriving on time, your mom cooking a delicious breakfast, to remembering to pay the bills on time. You would not believe how this helps you achieve your goals — by clearing the mind.

12. Care For Your Body

Love yourself and love your body! Your physical condition has a direct connection with your well-being. A fit body and healthy mind is reflective of happiness. Start working towards the health of your physical, mental and emotional energy by caring for your body. Not only does it secrete happy hormones but also creates a sense of awareness within you. You will learn to control your breathing, and by way of it, control your mind from wandering. Every time you meditate, you feel a surge of positive energy through your body that calms your nerves, soothes your mind, elevates your mood, and not to mention enhances your level of tolerance. Take up positive activities with others or in isolation. Share a joke, narrate a pleasant incident, take part in sporting activities, go for a run in the evening after work, have healthy sex, and you’ll find yourself bubbling with positive energy.

13. Believe

Connect to a higher power. You’re probably already doing this with or without knowing. Just a quick meditation or prayer is easy. If you have the time, join a local prayer group, visit a meditation center, or simply spend some time alone in nature. You don’t have to be religious to have faith. People who believe in a deity are generally happier than those who don’t. Sometimes all you need to be happier is a little faith!

14. Dream

Imagination fires motivation. Create a ‘dream board’ and dream up something new you wish to experience. It could be finding a new lover, climbing a mountain, learning calligraphy, or going back to college. Dreams motivate, inspire and expand our sense of self. They also make us happy because they give our lives a sense of purpose. Happy people usually love what they do, and if they don’t, they love who they are. Dreams remind us who we are.

15. Give

Cultivate a habit of sharing with others — your money, knowledge, service, wisdom, care, love. Find a person who shares a lot with others, and you will find a happy person. In giving, you always receive more. Not only do you get pleasure from giving, you give someone else pleasure. Giving has many unexpected benefits from attracting more happiness into your life, to inspiring others, and changing the lives of those you touch. In the end the whole world is made into a better place.  Ask, “how can I serve?” Pay it forward. Give freely.

By practicing these steps daily and being conscious of them, you will learn gratitude at a level you could never appreciate before. You’re made out of love, and there’s an opportunity at every corner to show it.

Source: “15 Things To Start Practicing Today To Be Happy,” from preventdisease.com, by Josh Richardson ~ Love & Laughter Always! – John

Suicide Prevention

lifeline

People who consider suicide do so because they are in deep emotional pain and want that pain to end. Suicidal people are impaired in their thinking and require assistance to find other options to deal with their pain.  Often warning signs or invitations to help are displayed.

Smart risk strategies for suicide prevention include:

Look First

Suicide is most often the result of a combination of factors, including physical, emotional and social influences. It is important to pay serious attention to any indication or suggestion of suicidal thoughts or actions.

Take Notice

It is important to take any indication or suggestion of suicidal thoughts or actions seriously. People in crisis will often give indications that they are in trouble, these are known as warning signs or invitations to help. Learn to identify the signs of suicide in yourself, or others, and know what to do. Warning signs include the following:

Warning signs (invitations to help):

  • threatens or talks about suicide or has a plan for suicide
  • talks about wanting to die or shows a preoccupation with death
  • shows changes in behaviour, appearance or mood• abuses drugs, alcohol, gambling
  • recent suicide attempts or other forms of self harm
  • risk-taking behaviour
  • expresses feelings of hopelessness
  • says things like “I’m going to kill myself,” “I wish I were dead,” “I shouldn’t have been born,” “I won’t be a problem for you much longer,” “Nothing matters,” or “It’s no use.”
  • makes statements about hopelessness, helplessness or worthlessness
  • gives away prized possessions or makes a will
  • loses interest in activities or things once cared about, always feels bored
  • has trouble concentrating or has difficulties with work, family life
  • often complains about physical symptoms that are related to stress and emotions, such as stomach aches, headaches or fatigue
  • becomes overly impulsive and may engage in violent actions

All suicidal thoughts or threats must be taken seriously, as should any behaviour that is out of character. Trust your instincts. If you are concerned about someone, tell others about it. Get help from family, friends, clergy, teachers, counsellors, doctors, crisis lines, mental health services or hospital emergency departments.

Ask

  • Are you thinking about suicide?
  • Do you have a plan?
  • Do you have a way to carry out your plan?

Listen

  • If the answer is yes, insist that together you find help.
  • Be aware that the more planning that goes into any event the more likely it is to happen.
  • Use your instincts about whether the person is at risk of suicide now.

Seek Help

  • If the risk of suicide is imminent it is an emergency:  Call 000
  • Need help now? Call Lifeline 13 11 14 (24/7)

Embrace the Moment and Learn To Be Happy

Tree Survive

Simply by learning to embrace and live in the moment you can achieve the happiness that seems to elude most people. Simple living is a concept that most people can’t imagine because the world is so complicated. Actually your world is what you have made of it and its pace has been created by you. Think for a minute of a typical day in your life. Is it rushed from the time you wake up? Are you stressed about everything along the way or is it calm and peaceful throughout the day? The way you are living is what you have chosen, not what has been given to you. Your life is the blueprint of the choices you have made, and will only change when you change the plan. Being happy is all relative to what it is that makes you happy. Everyone can learn to embrace the moment and be free of the patterns they have created. Think about if you are living your life expecting someone else to make you happy, or are you taking responsibility for your own happiness? Do you rely on money, family and friends to make your world happy even though those are outside forces that were created by your own decisions? Why can’t you live in the moment if it brings you joy instead of expecting something more from others?

A good place to start is with your own internal dialogue and what is in your head. If you tell yourself each morning that you are able to handle things calmly and honestly, and then remind yourself throughout the day that you are what you think, and then you will start to become aware of your actions. Look at the things that take place throughout your day without judgment so there is less stress in your life. Treat others with respect and respect will be given to you in return. Happiness comes from within, but how you have chosen to live in the external world that you have created, will determine how often you feel peace, joy, and respect. To be able to live with an attitude of gratitude and to be thankful for the simple things that cross your path every day will bring you more joy. Allowing that joy to enter your heart will bring peace to your soul. Internal peace is always found through self awareness and growth.

Make a list of the things that make you happy and look at how much, or how often those things are in your life now. Each day you should surround yourself with what actually brings you joy. First, knowing what those things are, and then creating the space for them will be the start of making joy prevalent in your life. You must also start to create boundaries and eliminate the things and people that are not serving you as well. Stop giving your energy each day to things that drain you. Start becoming aware of how you spend your time and what moments you are missing along the way. Appreciating simple pleasures each day will slow your mind down and bring you back to the basics of feeling joyful. Being aware of what’s right in front of you will force you into the moment. Embracing the many little moments that take place in a day can bring a lifetime of happiness and joy to your life.

Find a minute of peace in your day or evening to just close your eyes and give thanks with a happy heart for all your blessings. Call people you love more often and spend less time with those who are always angry. Create an outside activity each day even if it’s for 15 minutes and connect with the world. Commit yourself to organize something in your home or at work to get your surroundings in line with your values. Make a commitment to change just one thing today and embrace the moment, even if the moment is reading this article. Take a deep breath and close your eyes. Once you are relaxed, open your eyes and think about what you just read and how you can apply something to your present circumstance. It’s really up to you to make the simple changes that will help you embrace moments that can bring you happiness. If your world is so complicated that you can’t stop and feel some joy throughout your day, then enjoyment of the moment is lost. Stress and judgment will not bring you the happiness you deserve. You always have the power to bring joy into your life because your life is your own, and happiness is a choice. Uncomplicate the day and release the negative thoughts in your mind. The simple things that make you truly happy will become more prevalent and those moments you embrace will define your happiness.

Many Thanks to Denise Dema for this POST. Love & Laughter Always! – John

Humour Helps Coping With Stress

LOL Tablets

Humour can be a powerful and effective mechanism for coping with stress. The real power of humour and laughter shows up when you learn to use it in stressful situations. It keeps things in perspective, helps dispel negative emotions, and puts you in a frame of mind that can help you better cope with the situation. A more light-hearted outlook on life won’t make you stress-proof, but it can make the difficult things easier to endure.

If you’re willing to laugh at the little disasters in life, you’ll find that other areas of your life will also become easier. Laughter, especially when you laugh at yourself, does many important things:

• It empowers you. When you laugh at your setbacks, you no longer feel sorry for yourself. You feel uplifted and encouraged.

• It helps you communicate more effectively.

• It makes you more likeable.

• It helps you cope. Nothing erases unpleasant thoughts more effectively than concentration on pleasant ones.

• It provides perspective by removing you from your problems. Everyone makes mistakes, and we need to say to ourselves, “I may not be totally perfect, but parts of me are excellent.”

• People tend to be less threatened by you.

You may agree that laughing will help with your stress but agreeing with this doesn’t always help when the kids fight, miss the bus and leave you late for work. Everyone has his or her own sense of humour. If you’re not attuned to yours, you’ll end up missing many opportunities to use humour skills to deal with life’s stressors. Being an adult can be serious business, but so many people have lost the sheer capacity for fun, joy and laughter. Even when the opportunity is there, they miss it. Many adults have this problem that can be called “humour impairment.” Simply defined, it means the inability to find humour even in situations that are funny to most people. Stress can cause humour impairment.

Fortunately you can make the choice to change, to find the laughter in your life. You don’t have to laugh out loud to find something funny, but you do need to recognise the types of humour you will be able to use most effectively to manage stress. Do you like slapstick humour or verbal humour? Do you understand what kinds of humour offend you? Do you like jokes that focus on things you have in common with the comedian? Do you like humour built on current events? Do you like wordplay and puns? Do you like to see props and gimmicks? Do you find humour in things that weren’t necessarily meant to be funny? Answering these questions will help you identify what humour to seek to help reduce stress and have more fun in life. You also need to ask yourself how long you hold on to misery before letting loose with humour.

Love & Laughter Always! – John

Make 2013 Your Best Year Yet

 Never Give Up!

This article is used with the permission of Jim Koehneke, MA, Career & Life Coach. Additional articles and Jim’s contact information can be obtained through his website, http://www.worklifepurpose.com, or by email jim@worklifepurpose.com

The key to living a happy, healthy, creative and successful new year is to focus on what you want, and how to go about living day to day to bring that into reality. While it is easy to be thrown off track – (that’s what our minds and habits are good at doing) – the key is to notice what’s happening and quickly take action on getting back to playing your game, not someone else’s. Here are my top ten strategies for starting the year off in a way I want – the “how” to go about the “doing.” Keeping it handy (near my computer or posted on the fridge) makes it easier for me to see, notice, and take back authority over my life when I get thrown off track. Hope it might work for you as well.

1. Become a Kid Again

Get curious again. Live with a renewed sense of wonder. See through fresh eyes and a child’s heart. Be wildly fascinated, absurdly dazzled and delighted, and enraptured by exploration.

2. Love to learn and grow

Arouse your awareness. Learn from what worked, what didn’t. Become smitten by your smarts, and tantalize your thoughts. Seduce your senses, intoxicate your imagination. Be bold in your brilliance!

3. Know what life is calling you to do

Get quiet. Connect to your soul. Listen for the call. Write down your Purpose. See how it will benefit others.

4. Know what you want

Get specific, get committed. Know it in your heart. Feel it in your gut.

5. Make a plan

Be intentional. Write it down. Identify your end result. Break it into little steps.

6. Focus on what brings results, not what doesn’t

If you know clearly what you want and aren’t producing that result, ask yourself “why it isn’t showing up?” The answer, your “because statement” – is often the underlying belief you are using to unintentionally sabotage yourself. Ask, “Is this belief true?” (Often it is not, based on real evidence.) Replace the old belief with a new, possibly opposite paradigm, and act as if the new empowering way of being is absolutely true! (Then keep repeating it for 7 days.)

7. If you really want it, then work it full out

Get started, now. Give yourself a deadline. Celebrate each small win. Transcend limits. Defy the odds. Work hard. Persist.

8. Build you confidence

Make every action your best. Make every action count. Recall each small win. Celebrate your greatness. Write down positive feedback.

9. Grow your motivation

Be playful. Have fun. Sing, dance. Inspire others. Serve. Make a difference.

10.  Honor Yourself

Claim your Basic Goodness. Identify your Self as Love manifested, Love in action, Love expressing.

Thanks to Jim Koehneke for this article. Love & Laughter Always! – John

25 Life Lessons

Peace Jetty

A friend sent me this to put on the fridge.

1. What you do today is important because you are exchanging a day of your life for it.

2. If a person wants to be a part of your life, they will make an obvious effort to do so. Don’t bother reserving a space in your heart for people who do not make an effort to stay.

3. In life, you usually get what you ask for, but it rarely comes in the package you think it’s supposed to come in.

4. Never let one bad day make you feel like you have a bad life.

5. Tell the truth, or eventually someone will tell it for you.

6. Surround yourself with positive people who are going to push you toward greatness.  Eliminate those who are trying to keep you from it.

7. Maturity is not when we start speaking about big things, it’s when we start understanding the small things.

8. Not forgiving is like drinking poison and expecting the other person to die

9. Age wrinkles the body.  Quitting on your dreams wrinkles the soul.

10. The past can’t hurt you anymore – not unless you let it.

11. The path to our destination is not always a straight one.  We go down the wrong one, we get lost, and we turn back.  But maybe it doesn’t matter which road we embark on.  Maybe what matters is that we embark.

12. You can grow stronger from the pain if you don’t let it destroy you

13. The worst person to be around is the one who complains about everything and appreciates nothing.  Avoid these people at all costs.

14. Live in such a way that if someone decided to speak badly of you, no one would believe it.

15. It’s your road, and yours alone.  Others may walk it with you, but no one can walk it for you.

16. If someone can’t accept you at your worst, they don’t deserve you at your best.

17. The road to success is always under construction.

18. Never make a big decision when you’re angry, and never make a big promise when you’re overjoyed.

19. Don’t count the number of friends you have; count the number of friends you can count on.

20. Imperfections are important, and so are mistakes.  You get to be good by learning from your mistakes and you get to be real by being imperfect.

21. Not trying is failing.

22. Being happy doesn’t always make us grateful, but being grateful will always make us happy

23. The only time you should look back is to see how far you’ve come.

24. When something bad happens you can either let it define you, let it destroy you, or you can let it strengthen you.

25. Good relationships are not just about the good times you share; it’s also about the obstacles you go through together, and the fact that you still say “I love you” in the end.

Love & Laughter Always! ~ John

Make Positive Thinking Effective

 

We carry our past with us, to wit, the primitive and inferior man with his desires and emotions, and it is only with an enormous effort that we can detach ourselves from this burden. If it comes to a neurosis, we invariably have to deal with a considerably intensified shadow. And if such a person wants to be cured it is necessary to find a way in which his conscious personality and his shadow can live together. ~ Carl Jung

7 things you should do to make positive thinking effective.

1. Ownership

Whenever we get angry or irritated because of something people say or do to us it is so because we project our own shadows and our own darkness on to them.

Next time something negative happens and next time you come in contact with somebody you don’t quite like or maybe hate, ask yourself these questions: What is it about this person, situation that is triggering me? What is it about them that I haven’t yet accepted in me? Do I have some hidden open wounds that they touched? 

Everything that irritates us about others can lead us to an understanding of ourselves. ~Carl Jung

2. Non Resistance

If you feel the presence of anger in your life, let it be there, allow yourself to feel its presence but don’t allow it to define you, don’t allow you to become you!

Say to yourself: There is anger, frustration, negativity, etc. in me and I allow it to be there without making it my own. There is anger in me but I am not the anger, I am the observer of this anger.

Nonresistance is the key to the greatest power in the universe. ~ Eckhart Tolle

3. Acceptance

Accept yourself for who you are and for who you are not. Accept yourself both in the presence of positivity, progress and happiness and their absence. Accept the idea that what you dislike the most in others might be something hidden deep down within yourself, in your unconscious, something you haven’t accepted in yourself.

The difference between my darkness and your darkness is that I can look at my own badness in the face and accept its existence while you are busy covering your mirror with a white linen sheet. ~ C. JoyBell.

4. Forgiveness

Forgive yourself for always believing that the enemy was outside yourself and never within you. Forgive yourself for projecting your own shadows on to the world and making it look cold, scary and frightening.

We have met the enemy and he is us. ~ Pogo

5. Love and compassion

We have to learn to love and accept not only the good, bright side of us but also our dark side. Only by loving and accepting our own darkness without judging and oppressing it, we will help heal it.

Darkness cannot drive out darkness: only light can do that. Hate cannot drive out hate: only love can do that. ~ Martin Luther King Jr.

6. Vizualization

Visualization is such a powerful tool that you can use to visualize the person you want to become, the life you want to live and the impact you want to have in the world.

The power of imagination is incredible. Often we see athletes achieving unbelievable results and wonder how they did it. One of the tools they use is visualization or mental imagery… they made the choice to create their destinies and visualized their achievements before they ultimately succeeded. ~ George Kohlrieser

7. Detachment From the Outcome

Whether things will happen the way you want them to happen or not, should not matter to you that much. You now know that your happiness and your well being is not dependent on how things are on the outside but rather how things are on the inside and if you take good care of yourself and if you heal your darkness, you whole life will be healed and light will always shine on you and through you.

Detach yourself from the opinions of others; from the habit of judging or controlling others; from the past; from the need to be right and to win; from an obsession with material things. Follow your passion in life, but detach from the outcome and allow the universe to handle the details. ~Dr. Wayne Dyer

Positive thinking alone does not work and only by facing our own darkness, by accepting and loving our own shadows we will be able to get the positive results from thinking positive thoughts.

If you’ve enjoyed reading this post, feel free to share it with your loved ones – Sharing is Caring and Wisdom Never Decreases by Being Shared :)

Thanks to Luminita Saviuc for this post. Love & Laughter Always! – John

Your Life is What You Make it.

 

“If you limit your choices only to what seems possible or reasonable, you disconnect yourself from what you truly want, and all that is left is compromise.” Robert Fritz

Your life is what you make it. Your present  life is the result of all the choices you have ever made. You are the only one responsible for where you are right now, for how your life looks, for how you are being treated by those around you, for your level of happiness or unhappiness. You and only you. If you want to change the quality of your life, if you want to change the quality of the relationships you have, you have to start by taking responsibility for everything. Yes, everything!

If you keep on doing the same things over and over again, you will get the same results, over and over again. Your life will change the moment you decide it is time to change, it’s that simple. It all starts with a thought, an idea, and based on that, the actions you will take, will lead you in a different and new direction, will lead you in the right direction. Even though it may seem hard at first, in time, little by little, things will get better and better. Whenever you feel out of sync, burned out and powerless, whenever you feel like there is nothing left for you to do, repeat these words to yourself:

I choose to be patient for I know life is a journey not a destination.

I choose to forgive myself for all the mistakes I may have made in the past and to advance confidently in the direction of my dreams.

I choose to live a powerful and inspiring life.

I choose to express my gratitude and appreciation daily.

I choose to be happy, joyful and kind.

I choose to be an inspiration for all.

I choose to live a balanced life, for I know that balance is the key to a happy and successful life.

I choose to be content.

I choose to get up every time I go down and start all over again because I know that I CAN DO IT.

I choose to be opened in mind and spirit to what the world has to offer and embrace it all as it comes.

I choose to accept all the gifts life has to offer me.

I choose to allow events take their course without me trying to control everything.

I choose to be kind towards those people who like me and also those people who don’t.

I choose to always step out of my comfort zone, to stretch, to grow and to evolve.

I choose to take care of my health every single day for as long as I live.

I choose to help others grow and develop, knowing that, by doing so, I will grow with them.

I choose to always be true to myself.

I choose to always look at the bright side of life.

I choose to believe that everything I need, the universe will supply.

I choose to release all of my fears and doubts, knowing that they are all self created, keeping me away from achieving great things.

I choose to grow and develop into a wonderful, beautiful and powerful human being.

I choose to listen to my heart and intuition, knowing that they will always guide me in the right direction.

I choose to step into the unknown, knowing that in the unknown lies my freedom, my opportunity for growth.

I choose to let go of the past, be confident about the future, and to always be present in the now.

I choose to share my unique gifts and talents with the world.

I choose to always do what I love, and love what I do.

I choose to be loving towards myself and the world around me.

I choose to believe in myself, knowing that I have incredible potential and I can accomplish anything I set my mind to.

I choose to be free of the good intentions of others and to always live my life the way I feel is right for me.

I choose to have faith, knowing that things will always turn out for the best.

Thanks to the Purpose Fairy for this Wisdom. Love & Laughter Always! ~ John